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RAUK - Archived Forum - DO WE NEED A HERPS CoNFESSIoN COLUMM

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DO WE NEED A HERPS CoNFESSIoN COLUMM:

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AGILIS
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Joined: 27 Feb 2007
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
HI all here is a good chance to confess your sins committed while you were involved in herpetology  and share your guilt with others so you can be absolved and give us all a good laugh   your Father confessor   keith  AGILIS39193.2551273148
   LOCAL ICYNICAL CELTIC ECO WARRIOR AND FAILED DRUID
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007

OK then, my big sin.

Many eons ago, I was on holiday in Cumbria. Visiting Muncaster castle I found a display about Natterjacks being in the area. Getting back to the B&B out came the OS map, armed with a little knowledge of likely habitat and a good chance of ponds being marked on the OS map I spent an hour circling likely places, feeling like a real life detective.

The next day I was up early, being young and mobility challenged (no car or bike) I started to trudge my way to the most likely area. On arrival several hours later I was faced by a very high security fence.

Not to be deterred and having walked miles, over I went. Under the first rock I lifted, there it was my first ever adult natterjack. Walking a little further, two tiny ponds. I spent the rest of the day hiding in the dunes expecting the police to arrive at any minute, watching baby natterjacks around the pond margins. Won't ever forget that.

I leave it to those other detectives out there to work out which site I had found, I still wonder if I glow in the dark


Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
Alan Hyde
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Joined: 17 Apr 2003
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007

Hehehe , It would seem that it's all coming out now Gemma goes undercover
I'm afraid that as a teenager and into my early twenties I was a very bad lad indeed, I could have 3 or 4 pages of confession here

But then as my wife say's, I'm proof that Leopards can change their spots.

Ok, How did I feed that python being only 13 years old working part time in a pet shop? Burmese grow at an alarming rate and the amount a juve' puts away is astounding.

Confession 2
I would reguarly scan the papers for adds such as
"Rats /mice free to good home"
Then with my innocent 13 year old charm i'd walk up to the door and say, "Hi, it's my little sisters birthday next week and mum has said she can have a pair of rats/ mice"

As most of the adds were local sometimes i'd bump into the person i'd got rodents from in our local high street.
"Oh hi Alan! How are the mice doing?"
"Eh? Oh yeah, the mice, they're just fine thank you" And id whisper to myself "Brown and smelly, but fine"

Ok Ok , I know it's bad , i'm slapping my wrists now
O-> O+>
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
You terrible person Al, it is embarassing isn't it, "so how are the goldfish doing", eh?, "you know the goldfish you keep buying"... eer "Oh yes they are doing fine"... "you must really like goldfish, you buy so many"...eeeer... "Oh yes I love them to bits"  The result of capturing and keeping the first grass snake I ever saw. Still, we live and learn eh.
Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
Alan Hyde
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Joined: 17 Apr 2003
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
LOL! So, i'm not the only one !

But then Karma does have it's way.
This is more of an amusing story really, I see it as my comeuppance for those mice

I had a large boa constrictor and a guy in hampton wick said he'd do a straight swap for a rough necked monitor. I was young and didn't drive so i lept on the train.
We did the swap and he put the rough neck in a pillow case which I put down my Jacket as it was winter.
I then caught the train back home.
I sat in one of those small carriges that take about 8 people and it was full. Aboput halfway home everyone in that carrige got asailed by the strong aroma of monitor poo and a very runny large monitor poo! It seeped through the sack and soaked out down the front of my jeans, I looked and smelt like i'd had a big accident! .
I could not face the embarressment and pulled out the sack to explain to everyone that it wasn't me that had lost control. This just made matters worse as one woman started to heave and everyone left the carrige
But that was not the end of my ordeal, the Train station was 1 mile from my home and I had to walk along the main roads covered in varanus plop
O-> O+>
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
 bit like my experience of having to get on a train in Haslemere after a days herping on Hindhead.. strange thing about grassy skunk, when you warm up a bit on a crowded train the aroma is as fresh as when it is first delivered - amazing how many people can squeeze into one end of a railway carriage ain't it.
Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
AGILIS
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Joined: 27 Feb 2007
No. of posts: 694


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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
hi GEmma I think your only crime then was not doing a British nuclear fuel induction course .......from Father confessor keith 
   LOCAL ICYNICAL CELTIC ECO WARRIOR AND FAILED DRUID
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007

LOL Keith, back to Karma I think (and yes it was Sellafield), I now spend half my life doing Health & Safety induction courses. Now I know why!  

It always makes me laugh when doing contracts on high security sites to look back at my younger years when if I thought herps were there I would have got myself into area 51.

Can't wait to see what other forum users have to say about their sins, come on own up to Keith the Father Confessor. It is good for the soul. 

GemmaJF39193.2357523148
Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
arvensis
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Joined: 15 Mar 2006
No. of posts: 445


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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
[QUOTE=GemmaJF]

I leave it to those other detectives out there to work out which site I had found, I still wonder if I glow in the dark

[/QUOTE]

Nowadays of course, you'd be accused of being a terrorist and get banged up for x amount of days/weeks/months/years (delete as necessary).   High security... whats that then

Mark

Hampshire Amphibian and Reptile Group.
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
LOL Mark, fortunately it was in the days before everything you did was filmed by security cameras.
Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
armata
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Joined: 05 Apr 2006
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
Me sa y nutting
'I get my kicks on Route 62'
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
Come on Tony, you'll feel so much better when you confess
Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
armata
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
Well.......reluctantly, and this is a true story.

Those who know me well know that I am so laid back I am horizontal, slow to anger, but when roused I tend to go over the top.

My father had recently died, and my sister was arranging the sale of the house. This was in Slough (the armpit of England). The house got a buyer and all was going through when the estate agent, a young pushy type of fellow, announced the deal ws off but offered to buy the house 20K less than previously offered.
I was overseas, my sister took the deal. When I got home I found out the whole thing had been a scam, the original buyer was the brother of the estate agent.

I confronted him and he was cocky, and more or less said "prove it".
I couldn't prove it, and dearly wanted to alter his smarmy features.
However, the next day I arrived at his office; he looked up me with his cocky self-assured grin, and was about to say something when I tipper a one metre diamondback rattler on to his desk!!!
The rattler sounded off as if on cue and drew its head back. He fell back off his chair, and he had a nice wet patch on the front of his trousers, plus a smell that defintely wasn't urine.
I gathered up the snake, bagged it and disappeared.

In retrospect, it was a silly thing to do, but oh so satisfying - never heard anything more.

'I get my kicks on Route 62'
Alan Hyde
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Joined: 17 Apr 2003
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
Ah Sweet Sweet revenge! That's a great story Tony , Far to amusing to keep to yourself.
I have plenty of a similar nature , however they are not herp related
O-> O+>
armata
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
It wasn't the money, it was that he was playing on my sister's grief, and she is gullible at the best of times, bless her.
'I get my kicks on Route 62'
Alan Hyde
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
Completely understand that.
O-> O+>
GemmaJF
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007

That is fab Tony, OK maybe not the best thing to have done (don't try it at home kids) but, I bet you felt SO much better afterwards. Sounds like that estate agent had it coming to him. I wonder if he learnt his lesson?


Gemma Fairchild, Independent Ecological Consultant
AGILIS
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Joined: 27 Feb 2007
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
WELL DONE TONY but are you sure that you meant the armpit and not something else starting  with an A when you mentioned the town named after snakes shedding skin ........... father confessor 
   LOCAL ICYNICAL CELTIC ECO WARRIOR AND FAILED DRUID
armata
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
I was being polite

"come friendly bombs" and all that, if you know Betjemin.
'I get my kicks on Route 62'
AGILIS
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Joined: 27 Feb 2007
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Posted: 21 Apr 2007
hi Tony I thought so ...............keith
   LOCAL ICYNICAL CELTIC ECO WARRIOR AND FAILED DRUID

- DO WE NEED A HERPS CoNFESSIoN COLUMM

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